


never knew loving could hurt this good

by carstairsbane



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Sharing a Bed, minor Malec, minor izzy/maia, minor luke/maryse, most of the others appear as well but not as much
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-15
Updated: 2017-09-15
Packaged: 2018-12-30 03:48:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12100044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carstairsbane/pseuds/carstairsbane
Summary: “You mean, come to the wedding with you and pretend to be your boyfriend?”(Or, Jace tells Alec he has a date to Alec and Magnus' wedding. Except he doesn't. That's where Simon comes in.)





	never knew loving could hurt this good

**Author's Note:**

> This is completely self-indulgent but I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> Thank you to the wonderful [Martina](http://isabelledarkwoods.tumblr.com/) for beta reading this for me!
> 
> If there's anything that you think should be added to the tags, let me know.

“Jace! Hold up,” Alec called, jogging down the corridor towards Jace as he headed to the kitchen. Jace turned, thrumming his fingers against his leg as he waited for Alec to catch up with him.

“Hey Alec, what’s up?” Jace searched Alec’s face for a sign of his mood, trying to figure out if this was a ‘hey, how are you?’ kind of thing or a ‘I’m really stressed wedding planning can you do me a favour’ kind of thing.

“Well, you haven’t responded to the wedding invitation yet. Magnus and I need to know if you’re coming by the end of the week.”

“Sorry man, I thought I already had.” Jace rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Of course I’m coming!” Alec let out a sigh of relief.

“What about a plus one? Anyone we should know about?” Alec grinned teasingly.

“Yeah, actually there is.” Jace didn’t know what made him say it. Maybe it was just an impulsive reaction. Maybe it was the way his family had been bugging him about his love life recently. With Alec getting married there seemed to be some sort of expectation on him to start thinking about settling down as well. Or maybe it was the part of Jace that wanted to be in a relationship, to find something that he could really connect with and fall in love with.

Whatever the reason, his eyes widened as he realised that he’d just told his brother he had a date to his wedding when he didn’t.

“Great! Who-”

“Have you seen mom and Luke? I need to ask them something,” Jace interrupted before Alec could pry for details.

“Oh. Yeah, they were in the garden last I saw, but Jace - who are you bringing to the wedding?”

“Sorry, I gotta run. I’ll send you the details later.” With that, Jace all but sprinted back down the corridor pretending to head outside.

As soon as he was out of Alec’s sight, and sure Alec hadn’t followed him, he slumped against the wall breathing heavily.

“Shit.” Jace’s mind was racing. What had he done? Why had he lied? How was he going to find a date by the end of the week and make it seem like they’d been together for longer? Who could he possibly ask?

He took a few moments to breathe, trying to figure out how to solve this problem. He could tell Alec the truth but he didn’t want to admit that he’d lied. He could ask Izzy for help but she’d probably tell Alec and again, Jace didn’t want to deal with that. He ran through a list of people in his head, trying to figure out if any of them were wedding date potential. There was the girl, ‘Kaelie?’ he thought, he’d been chatting to at the bar a few weeks ago but she’d thrown a drink on him so probably wouldn’t be too willing. There was the cute guy he kept seeing at his favourite coffee shop but they’d never spoken and starting a conversation with 'Hey, will you be my date to my brother’s wedding' didn’t seem like the best idea. Maybe the best solution was to find someone he knew who could pretend to be dating him.

Sighing, Jace pushed himself away from the wall and headed up to his room. His mind immediately went to Simon but he rejected the idea almost as soon as he’d had it. Simon was his best friend but recently Jace had been wondering if his feelings were something more than friendship. Going to wedding together didn’t seem like the best way to try and figure out what he was feeling. Plus, it wasn’t in New York so it would involve spending a few days in close proximity with talk of romance and love in the air. Jace knew he’d get swept up in the atmosphere and the last thing he wanted to was to risk losing Simon’s friendship by telling him he liked him before Jace was even sure of it himself.

Grabbing his phone, he flopped onto the bed and scrolled through his contacts to figure out who might be able to help instead. He briefly considered asking Clary but she’d dated Izzy a few years back and while the two were still friends he thought it would be a bit weird to show up to his brother’s wedding with their sister’s ex, even if it was pretend. Plus now his mom was dating Luke, who was Clary’s dad in all but blood, the whole idea just seemed a bit off.

The next name he came across who he thought might be willing to help him was Maia. They’d been friends for a few years and they knew each other fairly well so there didn’t seem to be much harm in asking. Sending off a quick text asking if she could come over, Jace grabbed his jacket and headed outside to clear his head. He’d barely stepped out the door when Maia responded saying she’d be there in 20 minutes. Jace raised his eyebrows. He hadn’t expected her to be so quick, especially since he hadn’t said why he wanted to see her. He sent back a quick response before heading into the garden.

***

The Lightwood’s New York home used to be a church. When his business had really taken off and he and Maryse decided to start a family, Robert had purchased it and converted it into a large family home. He'd added an enclosed garden designed to allow their children to spend time outside without having to venture out of the safety of the home while they were too young to look after themselves.

When he was 10 years old Jace’s father, and Robert’s business partner, passed away and the Lightwoods had taken him in as one of their own. Jace was always made to feel like he was part of the family, and had eventually started calling Maryse and Robert mom and dad. When he turned 18, Jace had legally changed his surname to Lightwood and he couldn’t imagine his life without the family in it.

That wasn’t to say, however, that he didn’t still think of his father. Jace had found the first couple of years with the Lightwoods particularly difficult even with the love and support they showed him. He’d gone from living with just his father to living with two parents and having three siblings which was more than a little overwhelming. When it all got too much Jace had taken to exploring the house and garden. His explorations had led him to a small nook of the garden hidden away behind some hedges and it soon became Jace’s hideaway when he needed to get away from the chaos or wanted to think about his father. As he got older, Jace visited less and less but if he was having a particularly difficult time he always found his way back there.

It was here that Jace was sitting when Maia texted him to let him know that she’d arrived. Jace moved into the main part of the garden and messaged Maia to tell her where to find the spare key and to come and join him in the garden since it was a nice day.

“Hey!” Maia appeared a few moments later and sat next to Jace on the bench. “It’s unlike you to initiate a meet up! What’s up?”

“There’s something I wanted to ask you actually.” Maia tilted her head and raised her eyebrows. Jace launched into an explanation of his predicament. By the time he finished Maia was shaking her head at him and rolled her eyes fondly.

“Oh Jace, how do you always get yourself into these messes?”

“Hey! I resent that. What other messes?”

“Do you want the list chronologically or in ascending order of messiness?” Maia laughed.

Jace narrowed his eyes at her, the smile playing on his lips giving away his amusement. “Ok fine. I get myself into a lot of messes. But can you help me with this one? Will you be my date to Alec’s wedding?”

Maia bit her lip as a small laugh escaped. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh but there’s something I should probably tell you! I’m dating Izzy.” Jace stared at Maia for a moment, mouth open.

“We haven’t really been publicising it,” she continued when Jace didn't say anything. “It’s only been a few weeks so we were keeping it quiet. Alec knows, Izzy had to tell him when she said she had a date for his wedding, but it’s still new so we didn’t want too many people to know. It’s been good so far though, really good. I don’t know if you’ve realised but your sister is an incredible person!” Maia’s eyes were bright, her smile wide, as she spoke about Izzy and Jace couldn’t help but grin.

“She is,” Jace agreed with a fond smile. “I’m really happy for you!”

“Thanks.” Maia blushed. “I’m sorry I can’t help you though.”

“No, it’s fine. Honestly.”

“I’ll try and help you another way if I can, see if I can set you up with someone,” Maia said.

“Thanks, I appreciate it.”

They sat talking for a while longer, catching up on what they’d missed in each other lives. Maia kept finding ways to mention Izzy in the conversation. Jace didn’t even think it was a conscious decision on her part and he was glad his sister had found someone who really liked her. He was happy for Maia too, she deserved someone who would really care for her and treasure her which he knew Izzy would do.

“Now if you don’t mind, I have a dinner date with Izzy,” Maia said some time later, a light blush on her cheeks. Jace smiled. That explained why Maia had been able to show up so quickly, she was already planning to come over that day.

“Of course not. Have a good time!”

“I will,” Maia laughed, standing up and heading inside the house.

Jace followed a few minutes later and headed to his room. He flopped down face first and screamed into his pillow. He was running out of options.

***

A couple of hours had passed and Jace still hadn’t come up with a solution when there was a knock on his door. Looking up he saw Izzy leaning against his door frame, a jacket in her hand that very much resembled the one he’d seen Maia wearing earlier.

“Did you have a good evening?” he asked with a smile.

“Yes, I did.” Izzy’s own smile was soft as she walked into Jace’s room and sat on his bed. “But that’s not why I’m here. I hear you’re trying to find someone to be your date to the wedding?”

Jace sat up and sighed. “Maia told you?” Izzy nodded. “Yeah, I may have told Alec I was bringing a plus one and now I need to find someone to go with me.”

“Do you though? Need to find someone, I mean. Couldn’t you just tell Alec that you don’t have a date? He and Magnus haven’t finalised the numbers yet so you wouldn’t exactly be putting them out.”

“I know that, but- I don’t know, Iz. I don’t want to admit to him that I lied. I don’t even know why I said I had a date, it just came out, but I can’t go back on what I said.”

“You’re so stubborn sometimes,” Izzy said, shaking her head. “But in that case, we’d better get to work.” Taking of her shoes so she could sit cross-legged on the bed, she looked at Jace with what the family had started referring to as her ‘business face’. “Have you asked anyone else apart from Maia?”

“No. I thought about asking Clary but I figured that might be a bit weird.” Izzy just hummed in agreement.

“Ok, well what about Meliorn? He’s always up for a bit of fun!”

“I thought about that but he’s on holiday the week of the wedding so that’s a no go.”

“Right.”

Izzy and Jace sat in silence for a while. Several long minutes had passed when Izzy sat up suddenly looking excited.

“Wait! I can’t believe I didn’t think of him before. What about Simon?”

“Simon?” Jace swallowed. “But- He’s my best friend, Izzy. Wouldn’t that be a bit awkward? That’s why I didn’t ask him for help in the first place.” That wasn’t strictly true, Jace told himself. The main reason he hadn’t wanted to ask Simon was the fact that Jace was beginning to realise his feelings for Simon might not be strictly platonic.

“No! That’s exactly what makes him the best person to ask. Think about it, you’ve known each other since we started high school, you’ve been best friends for years and you spend a ton of time together. He must know you better than anyone else by now?” Jace nodded. “Well in that case, he’s perfect! Who else knows you well enough to pretend to be dating you?” When Jace didn’t respond, Izzy stood up and grabbed her stuff from the bed. “You’ll talk to him?”

“Yes, I’ll talk to him.” Jace agreed somewhat reluctantly, figuring at this point that Simon might be his best option.

“Brilliant. See you tomorrow then.” With that Izzy headed out of his room, leaving Jace alone with his thoughts.

Maybe Izzy was right. Simon _was_ his best friend and Jace knew he’d be happy to help. But there was the tiny problem of Jace’s feelings. The way Jace saw it spending all that time together would only intensify his feelings for Simon. But then maybe it would have the opposite effect. Maybe spending a few days pretending to date Simon would show Jace that they weren’t meant to be together, that they weren’t compatible as a couple. Jace continued to go back and forth over the potential consequences of taking Simon as his date to the wedding as he slowly drifted off to sleep.

***

Jace woke up the next morning feeling apprehensive. Saturday was what he referred to as his ‘Simon day’. Every Saturday the two of them met up and spent the day doing something fun or relaxing. They’d started the tradition during freshman year of college. Simon had been feeling the pressure to do well and had worked himself until he was ill. When he’d turned up at Jace’s door looking pale and with the darkest circles under his eyes Jace had felt compelled to act. He’d helped Simon plan his week so that he could get his work done but still look after himself. He’d designated Saturday as a day when the two of them would meet for a catch up, if they hadn’t had a chance to do so during week, and do something that would help them both forget about work for a while. Sometimes they went to the cinema, sometimes Simon turned up at Jace’s with his guitar and, with Jace on the piano, they’d write songs and sometimes they’d go out for food.

That day they’d arranged to meet at a coffee shop near Simon’s flat. Jace had been looking forward to seeing Simon all week and he still was but the added pressure of asking Simon to be his date for Alec and Magnus’ wedding was looming over him. He was running out of time and if Simon didn’t agree to help Jace knew he’d have to tell Alec the truth. He ran a shaky hand over the back of his neck and pushed the door open.

As soon as Jace stepped inside the coffee shop Simon called his name and waved at him. Jace grinned and headed over to the table Simon was sat at, complete with two coffees and a large slice of cake.

“I figured I’d get your usual order for you while I waited,” Simon said by way of greeting. “I already ate my cake though!”

“Thanks.” Jace sat down opposite Simon who launched into a recap of everything that had happened that week. Jace was only half paying attention, instead watching the way Simon’s face lit up as he spoke, the way his eyes crinkled in the corners as he laughed his way through a story of something he and Rebecca had done. Jace was pulled from his thoughts when he realised Simon had been saying his name.

“Huh?”

“I asked if you were ok,” Simon said. “You seem a bit out of it. You just nodded and said ‘that’s nice’ when I told you I was going on holiday to Jakku. What’s up?”

“There’s actually something I wanted to ask you.” Simon just tilted his head as an indication that Jace should continue. “So you know how Alec and Magnus are getting married soon? Well, I kind of told Alec that I’d be bringing a date to the wedding. And well, as you’re aware, I’m painfully single but I don’t want to go back on what I said and everyone that I’ve thought about asking is either busy or not single so basically I was wondering if you’d be my date?”

The end of Jace’s sentence came out in a rush and Simon had to ask him to say it again. Jace flushed bright red as he repeated his question, watching as Simon’s eyes widened.

“You mean, come to the wedding with you and pretend to be your boyfriend?”

“I know it’s a lot to ask. Especially because it’s my brother’s wedding and it’s spread over a few days and it’ll be a big family thing but my parents already know and love you, as does everyone who meets you. You’re quite charming you know!” Jace joked, sounding more confident than he felt.

“It’s a bit different them knowing me as your best friend and them thinking I’m your boyfriend.” Simon’s voice wavered on the last word which didn’t go unnoticed by Jace. Simon didn’t sound uncomfortable with the idea, not at all. ‘He sounds almost hopeful’ Jace’s mind helpfully supplied. He quickly dismissed the thought, putting it down to wishful thinking.

“I know, but they already know we’re close so it wouldn’t really be that big of a leap to believe that we’re dating? And remember how Max thought we _were_ dating the first time he met you?” Simon and Jace chuckled at the memory. Max had been much younger and hadn’t quite mastered the art of subtlety. He’d taken one look at Simon and said ‘are you Jace’s boyfriend?’ When Simon told him that he wasn’t Max had just said ‘oh’ and wandered off looking disinterested.

“Look, I completely understand if you don’t want to do it,” Jace continued, “but honestly? There’s no one else I’d rather do this with. You know me better than anyone else and-”

“I’ll do it. It’s you, of course I will! I just need to know what I’m letting myself in for.”

“Yeah, of course,” Jace replied. “It’s in about a month, at Robert and Maryse’s vacation home in Europe so we’ll go out a few days before the wedding for a week or so.” He slid his wedding invitation across the table towards Simon so he could have a look at it.

“Oh,” Simon sighed, tapping the date on the invitation, “that’s right before my sister’s birthday. I can still come, but I’ll have to leave the day after the wedding to get back in time. Will that be alright?”

“Yes, no problem. You’re doing me a favour here so whatever you need to do!”

“Ok great. It sounds cool, I’ve never been to Europe. But why is it there? Aren’t all of Alec and Magnus’ friends in New York?”

“They are, but we have a lot of family out there and Robert and Maryse have a house on the French-German border which-”

“I thought they’re weren’t on speaking terms at the moment. Didn’t you say they hate each other now?” Simon interrupted.

“ _Hate_ might be a bit strong but pretty much. They split the vacation home between them now but they’re trying to put up an amicable front for all their important friends or something so they offered to host the wedding there. I’m not entirely sure how they got Alec and Magnus to agree but it’s a beautiful place. If that still works for you? It’s not exactly a one day lowkey event round the corner...” Jace trailed off, looking over at Simon.

“No, of course not. I’d love to go.” Simon grinned at Jace who let out a sigh of relief.

“Ok, good. Well, we can meet up to figure out a story and work out some boundaries, anything that you want to do to make it easier for you. Thank you, thank you!”

“Yeah, yeah.” Simon rolled his eyes at Jace. “You’re buying me lunch though.”

“Absolutely! Now, tell me more about this holiday to Jakku.”

Simon’s laughter rang out across the coffee shop and Jace wished he could stay in that moment forever.

***

Back at home, Jace pulled the wedding invitation out of his pocket and wrote Simon’s name in the RSVP section. Alec took a while to answer his door and when he poked his head around the door Jace could hear Magnus’ laugh from inside.

“Here’s my RSVP. Just in time!” Jace passed the card to Alec who thanked Jace before moving to shut door again. Jace had barely turned to head back down the corridor when Alec called for him to wait. Jace took a deep breath before turning round to face his brother.

“You’re dating Simon? How long has this been going on? Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I, uh, yeah. I’m dating Simon.” Jace tried not to focus on how much he wished that statement were true. “It’s quite, uh, new. Very new in fact. We were waiting to tell you but since you needed a reply about the wedding I guess, uh, I guess there’s no time like the present.” Jace forced himself to sound cheerful but rubbed the back of his neck nervously, noticing that Alec’s shouts had brought Magnus and Izzy to the corridor. Izzy caught Jace’s eye from behind Alec and winked.

“Oh, well that’s great! Ho-” Alec was about to launch into another round of questioning when Magnus placed a hand on his arm.

“I’m sure Jace has got better things to do than answer all your questions, Alexander,” Magnus said. “And so do we,” he added in a whisper just loud enough for the others to hear. Alec turned to look at his fiancé for a moment, a light blush dusting his cheeks, before turning back to Jace.

“Well, thanks for telling us. See you tomorrow!” Without waiting for Jace to respond, Alec and Magnus disappeared back into Alec’s room. Jace eyes flickered to where Izzy had been standing but she’d slipped away unnoticed.

He was about to pop into the kitchen to grab a snack when he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. Pulling out he saw he had a message from Maia: _So you’re ‘dating’ Simon, huh? Good for you!_ Word travelled fast apparently, Izzy must have messaged her as soon as she heard.

Sighing, Jace grabbed some chocolate from the cupboard and headed back to his room to try to figure out how on earth he could pull this off.

***

Aside from their usual Saturday meetup, Jace and Simon met up several other times over the next few weeks, partly to help with the illusion that they were dating but also to work out the logistics of their fake relationship.

“I mean, to anyone who doesn’t know us that well it probably already looks like we're dating,” Simon was saying. “We message each other all the time, we have our weekly Saturday meetup which is just for us, we constantly ditch the others because we already have plans together and we don’t exactly shy away from physical affection.” Simon looked down at Jace whose head was resting on his lap as they lounged about in Simon’s flat. “Rather proving my point there, buddy.” Jace didn’t make any effort to more, just shrugged and opened his eyes to look at Simon.

“That’s all very well, but a lot of the people at the wedding _will_ know us well and they’ll know that we haven’t been dating the whole time.”

“Yeah, true.” Simon paused for moment before continuing, “We can just say that one of us confessed their feelings and the other felt the same. Something simple. We don’t need some elaborate get together story. Life doesn’t always have to be dramatic.”

Jace raised his eyebrows at Simon. “Really? Have you ever met me?” Simon laughed, disturbing Jace who sat up and turned to face Simon.

“But ok, we’ll go with your idea. So who confesses first? I think it’d be you. You’re always waxing lyrical about love and writing soppy songs,” Jace joked, poking Simon’s side. Simon responded by slapping him lightly on the arm.

“That is not true in the slightest. Well, maybe once or twice but that’s beside the point. Anyway, I’m the one doing you a favour here so if anyone’s going to be doing the chasing it should be you.” Simon fixed Jace with a pointed stare and Jace couldn’t resist the urge to roll his eyes.

“Ok, fine. So one day I finally built up the courage to tell you how I felt and you basically leapt into my arms-” Simon prodded Jace “-ok fine, you told me you felt the same way and we had a _mature_ conversation about it like the adults we are,” Jace concluded.

“Much better,” Simon said, nodding in agreement. “Now we’ve figured that out can we get back to watching Star Wars?”

***

A week later, Jace was back at Simon’s and the pair were trying to figure out some ground rules for their fake relationship.

“We need to make sure we’re a believable couple but I don’t want to do anything that either of us is uncomfortable with. So, holding hands and hugging is ok?” Jace asked.

“Yeah, it’s nothing we haven’t done before anyway. And I’m fine with like pecks on the cheek or forehead or whatever and the occasional kiss if the mood calls for it but nothing too much. Even if we _were_ dating I wouldn’t be comfortable with excessive public displays of affection, you know?”

“Yeah, I get it. That sounds good to me,” Jace responded. “And we should probably share at least one slow dance at the reception right?”

“Oh absolutely. I’d expect nothing less and, you know, if you wanted to dip me during the dance I’d totally be ok with that,” Simon said, a twinkle in his eyes.

“If you insist,” Jace laughed, “but if I drop you it’s not my fault!”

“What?! That would definitely be your fault, I’d be putting my trust in you!” Simon exclaimed. Jace just gave a brief smile in response and Simon watched him for a moment before speaking again. “The important thing is that we just keep communicating.”

“Agreed,” Jace said.

***

The next couple of weeks flew past and before Jace knew it he and Simon were at the airport waiting to head out to the Lightwood’s residence in France. Alec, Magnus, Maryse and Luke had flown out a week ago to get the house in order and to sort out the final details with the officiant. Izzy and Maia had left a couple of days later so that they could do some travelling together before the wedding which left Jace and Simon to fly out alone. The closer they got to the event the more nervous Jace was feeling so he was particularly grateful that they’d booked onto an overnight flight so he could just sleep his way through it.

Arriving at the airport in France was not the end of the journey however. They still had to get to Lightwood’s home which meant a few more hours travelling through the French countryside. Now wide awake, the trip was filled with Simon talking excitedly and asking Jace a lot of questions.

“So this is where you spent your summers?” Simon asked, staring open-mouthed at the scenery passing them by. “It’s beautiful.”

“Yeah, it is.” Jace took a moment to take in his surroundings, memories of his youth flooding back to him. “We’d stay at the house some of the time and then spend a few weeks travelling around. One year we went to Spain, another to Italy, that kind of thing. It was good. Really good actually. It was the most time any of us ever got to spend with mom, she was always busy doing this or that back in New York but over the summer she’d take us to museums and galleries. We all hated it back then but I can appreciate it now,” Jace chuckled as Simon nodded along to his story. “Looking back it was as much for her as it was for us. Dad never came with us, always holed up at the house making business calls, he barely had anytime for us. Or her. I think she kept us busy as a distraction. I’m glad she’s got Luke now, she’s much happier than she was back then and Luke always has time for us even though we aren’t his kids.”

“Luke’s a good man. He looks out for everyone, he was always there for me after my dad died. I’m glad he’s got your mom too. He was lonely for so long after Jocelyn, he deserves to be happy again,” Simon said quietly.

Jace spent the rest of the journey regaling Simon with stories of his summers travelling around Europe and before they knew it they’d arrived at the Lightwood’s home. Luke and Maryse were waiting outside when they arrived and embraced them warmly upon arrival.

“Simon, it’s good to see you here. I’m glad you could make,” Maryse said, pulling him into a hug.

“I’m glad to be here. Thank you for letting me stay with you.”

“Oh, it’s no bother at all. You must be tired after travelling. Jace, I’ve set up your old room for the two of you. I’ll let you show Simon around. We’re having a family dinner tonight but you’re free to rest until then.” Placing a kiss on her son’s forehead, Maryse and Luke headed back into the house. Jace and Simon grabbed their bags and followed them through the door.

“So here’s my room,” Jace kicked the door open with his foot and dumped his bags on the floor. The room was huge, with high ceilings and a large double bed. On the other side of the room was a door to the ensuite bathroom. Jace sat on the bed as Simon took in his surroundings. He watched as Simon’s eyes scanned the room before landing on the bed where Jace was sitting, widening slightly in realisation.

“Mom set you up in here because she believes we’re dating but if sharing a bed makes you uncomfortable I can sleep on the sofa or get another bed brought in or something.”

“No, it’s fine. I just hadn’t really thought about it. The bed’s plenty big enough for the both of us, it’s not like we’ll be pressed for space. I do move around a lot when I sleep though but I’ll try not to kick you!”

“Oh great, just what I need, being kicked out of my own bed in the middle of the night. What a pleasure it’ll be to share this experience with you.” Jace smirked at Simon before standing up. “Come on, I’ll show you around.”

***

After Jace gave Simon a whirlwind tour of the house the two collapsed on some sofas, exhausted from all the travelling. They were found asleep, Jace’s head resting on Simon’s shoulder, by Maryse some time later who woke them up to inform them that dinner was almost ready. Heading into the dining room, they saw that all the Lightwoods were there except Robert as well as Luke, Magnus and Maia.

They’d barely sat down when the questioning began.

“So Jace, when did this happen?” Maryse asked, gesturing at Jace and Simon with her glass. Jace starting telling his family the story that they’d come up with a few weeks ago. Simon reached for the hand that Jace was tapping on his knee and squeezed it gently, holding it in his own as Jace continued the story. As he spoke, Jace saw Izzy and Maia share a knowing look. Maryse continued asking the pair questions and Jace knew it was only because she cared but that didn’t help him feel any less tense.

The interrogation was interrupted by a timer going off in the kitchen. Luke and Maryse left the room, returning several minutes later with dishes of food. As they ate, the conservation turned to the topic of Alec and Magnus’ wedding but Jace found himself unable to concentrate on it, instead thinking about how the calming effect of Simon’s hand holding his own and how natural it had felt.

They played up their relationship in little ways throughout dinner, a ‘can you pass the salt please babe?’ here and a lingering stare there as well as maintaining some sort of physical contact between courses.

After dinner Jace, Simon, Izzy and Maia moved to the garden where there was a large patio area covered by a wooden gazebo. Maia used the skills she’d picked up from her part-time job in a bar to keep the cocktails flowing as the four of them chatted.

Simon and Izzy were have an animated discussion about the upcoming Star Trek series so Maia used the opportunity to move over to where Jace was sitting. She sat back in the chair legs crossed and just watched him for a second or two before speaking.

“You like him don’t you?” she whispered, head tilted to one side as she looked at Jace.

“Of course I do, we’re friends.” Maia rolled her eyes.

“That’s not what I meant and you know it. You might be pretending to date him at the moment but I saw how you were looking at him over dinner. You had a serious case of heart eyes that can’t be faked.”

“Ok yes, maybe I do like him as more than a friend.  That’s why he wasn’t the first one I asked to be my fake date. I didn’t want to have to deal with trying to figure out my feelings for Simon while he was right there pretending to be my boyfriend. But Maia, you can’t tell anyone, not even Izzy. This celebration is about Alec and Magnus’ and I don’t want to take away from that. Promise me you won’t say anything,” Jace whispered urgently.

“Hey.” Maia raised her hands in surrender. “I wouldn’t do that, Jace. You know I wouldn’t. Your feelings are your own to talk about, or not, as you please. I’ve got your back. And you know I’m here if you want to talk. I’ve been through the whole pining thing myself,” she said, glancing over at Isabelle, eyes softening as she watched her girlfriend laughing with Simon. Izzy looked over at Maia, smile widening impossibly as she realised her girlfriend was looking at her. Jace smiled at the sight, happy that they’d found each other but wishing someone, a certain someone, would look at him like that.

He finished the rest of his cocktail and Maia immediately plucked it out of his hand. Standing up and speaking loudly enough to catch the other two’s attention she asked if everyone was ready for another round. Izzy and Simon cheered and Maia moved to the table where she’d set up all the drinks. Jace moved to a seat closer to Simon and Izzy and the trio watched as Maia mixed them some more drinks, showing off some of the tricks she’d picked up, before coming to join them again.

The conversation continued to flow comfortably between the group until Jace heard Simon ask when Clary was arriving and there was something about his tone that made Jace freeze. The pair were close and Jace had always wondered if there was something more there. Simon was a man of his word and Jace knew he’d keep up the fake dating charade but he couldn’t help but wonder why Simon sounded so impatient for Clary’s arrival. He zoned out of the conversation after that until he was jolted from his thoughts by the sounds of chairs moving as Izzy and Maia announced they were heading to bed.

Suddenly feeling rather tired himself, Jace said he was going to bed as well so he and Simon headed inside.

“You can use the bathroom first,” Jace offered as they stepped into his, no _their_ , bedroom. Simon vanished into the bathroom and Jace changed into his pyjamas and sat on the bed to wait for Simon to be done.

“All yours,” Simon said when he emerged a few minutes.

Jace took his time getting ready for bed and by the time he was done Simon was already half asleep, having stolen most of the sheets in the process. Jace climbed into bed and tugged at little bit of sheet he did have. Simon made a disgruntled noise and pulled back on his own side. This went on for a while until Jace sighed in resignation.

“I didn’t take you for a sheet hog,” Jace muttered although there was no malice behind his words. Instead he clambered out of bed and grabbed a blanket from the top of his wardrobe.

***

When Jace woke the next morning the space beside him was empty and Simon was nowhere in sight. Quickly getting ready, Jace headed downstairs where he found Simon and Luke chatting in the dining room, a mountain of toast between them. Simon’s head turned at the sound of Jace walking in and he beamed at him. Jace’s heart flipped-flopped at the sight. It was too early for this.

“Hey babe,” Simon said brightly. “Sorry I left you this morning but I woke up to the smell of food and had to come and investigate.”

“That’s ok,” Jace replied, taking the seat next to Simon and leaning over to press a kiss to his cheek. “Morning Luke,” he added as he reached for some toast.

“Morning Jace, I was wondering when you were going to notice me,” Luke chuckled, standing up. “I’ll leave you two lovebirds to it.” He grabbed a couple of slices of toast off the plate and headed out of the room. Simon turned to Jace once he was gone.

“Luke was just filling me in on the plan for the day. Most of the other wedding guests are arriving at some point so they’ll be a lot of greeting people and showing the ones who are staying here to their rooms. That’s more for you though because I have no idea where anything is in this place. I almost got lost this morning. If I hadn’t been following the smell of food who knows where I’d have ended up!”

“I’m sure we’d have found you eventually!” Jace laughed, bumping Simon’s knee with his own.

“Oh eventually! That’s reassuring. Anyway, Luke gave me this list of instructions from Maryse.” Simon held up a few pieces of paper stapled together “She’s tasked us with decorating the tables for the meal and there’s a lot to do so we should probably get on with it.”

***

By lunchtime Jace and Simon were exhausted but they had no time to relax. They joined the rest of the Lightwood family in front of the house to greet the first lot of guests as they arrived. As they stood there, Simon grabbed Jace’s hand and laced their fingers together, Jace instantly feeling warmth and comfort spread through his body. The next hour or so was spent reliving the start of their relationship as each new guest, mostly distant relatives who Jace hadn’t seen for years, wanted to know when ‘such a handsome couple had got together’. Jace let out a sigh of relief as soon as the guests had been shown to their rooms and he and Simon were able to return to their decorating in peace.

Eventually they put the finishing touches to the table displays and retreated to Jace’s room to get ready for dinner. They chatted as they did so, Simon asking Jace questions about all the people he’d met earlier that day and Jace telling him tales from his childhood. Simon seemed genuinely interested in hearing about them, as he always did when listening to someone else speak, and Jace was overcome with a wave of affection for him. Simon cared so deeply about the people in his life and Jace couldn’t believe that he was one of those people.

When Simon disappeared into the bathroom, Jace thought back to the events of the day so far. He’d spent a lot of time holding Simon’s hand when the other wedding guests were around and they fit together so well it felt like some kind of sign. On top of that, Simon’s hands had kept brushing against his as they decorated the tables. It had happened so many times that Jace had to wonder whether it had been accidental or if maybe Simon had been doing it on purpose. There hadn’t been anyone else around so it wasn’t to keep up the illusion of them dating and Jace couldn’t help but ask himself what it meant. Did Simon like him back? Or was Jace just letting his imagination get the better of him? Sighing, Jace ran a hand over his face as Simon re-entered the room.

***

Not one to do things by halves, Maryse had organised a buffet meal in the garden. During the day, someone had placed lanterns around the garden which illuminated it perfectly and the light reflecting off the fountain was particularly beautiful. Jace stood watching the colours dance through the water until Simon came up behind him, placing a hand on Jace’s shoulder.

“Are you ok?” Simon asked, looping an arm through Jace’s as they headed towards the buffet table.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” He wasn’t lying, not really. He was happy for Alec and Magnus and he was happy to see so many friends and family but seeing so many couples happy and in love was also reminding him how he was currently fake dating the guy he had a crush on. Jace swallowed the bitter taste in his mouth, determined to enjoy the evening, and smiled at Simon. Simon didn’t look like he completely believed Jace but handed him a plate and started piling his own high with food.

Once they’d eaten, Simon pressed a kiss to Jace’s cheek, telling him he’d be back in a minute, before heading over to greet Clary who had just arrived. Jace watched as they had a whispered conversation. Simon glanced over at Jace and caught him staring. Jace blushed and was about to look away when Izzy approached the pair, guitar in hand. From what Jace could gather the two girls were trying to talk Simon into performing a couple of songs.

His theory was confirmed a moment later when Simon grabbed the guitar and headed to the small platform that had been set up. Simon’s eyes scanned the crowd for Jace and Jace waved to catch his attention. Simon grinned when he saw Jace before launching into his go-to song, _Forever Young_. It was the first song he’d sung at his first gig while they were in college. Jace still remembered how nervous Simon had been before the performance and how relieved he’d then felt when it went well. Simon still performed it first at every gig he played.

People were swaying to the music, some singing along quietly, when Simon began to segue into a song that Jace knew but had never heard Simon singing before.

_Well you done done me and you bet I felt it_  
_I tried to be chill but you're so hot that I melted_  
_I fell right through the cracks  
_ _Now I'm trying to get back_

Jace couldn’t take his eyes off Simon, couldn’t help but notice the emotion in his voice as he sang and then Simon hit the chorus and looked up, meeting Jace’s eye.

_But I won't hesitate no more, no more  
_ _It cannot wait, I'm yours_

Jace’s heart was pounding. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Aline nudge Helen and nod in his direction, thinking Simon was singing about Jace. But it had to be a coincidence. Jace just happened to be in Simon’s line of sight as he raised his head. Right? But hadn’t Simon sought him out before he started? Jace didn’t know what to think and watched the rest of Simon’s performance in stunned silence.

When he was finished Simon handed the guitar back to Izzy and headed towards Jace. Jace opened his arms to draw Simon into a hug.

“That was amazing, Simon,” Jace said as he pulled away, “and I’d never heard you sing I’m Yours before. It was beautiful.” Simon blushed and turned away but he caught Jace’s hand in his and didn’t let go as his friends came up to congratulate him.

They barely left each other’s side for the rest of the evening, holding hands or cuddling up to each other as they ate and drank and laughed with their friends. For appearances of course, Jace reminded himself, but he couldn’t help but think that something had changed.

As the evening wore on people slowly began to head to inside. Jace was beginning to feel sleepy himself, stifling yawns and feeling his eyes drooping shut.

“Hey love,” Simon whispered, placing a warm hand on Jace’s arm. “Do you want to head in?”

Jace hummed his agreement and Simon stood, offering a hand to help Jace up. They headed inside together, Simon’s arm around Jace’s waist and Jace’s flung across Simon’s shoulders.

That night, they stood side by side in their pyjamas brushing their teeth. Jace caught Simon’s eye in the mirror and they shared a soft smile. It felt so _normal_ to Jace, as if they’d done it a hundred times before. But they hadn’t and they wouldn’t, Jace thought ruefully. In a few days their fake relationship would be over and they’d go back to just being friends.

***

Maryse wanted everyone up early the next morning to help with the final preparations before the afternoon’s ceremony. Simon had set an alarm the night before to wake them but Jace woke up earlier and headed down to the kitchen to make his favourite comfort food - pancakes.

Simon joined him some time later. He hadn’t styled his hair yet so his gentle curls fell across his forehead and Jace had the strongest urge to run his fingers through Simon’s hair, to feel the soft curls beneath his fingers. Instead he smiled at Simon and flipped the pancake he was making onto an already piled-high plate.

“Pancakes?” Simon asked, his voice still raspy from sleep.

“Yeah, they’re my favourite breakfast.”

“Clearly,” Simon chuckled, looking at the plate of pancakes. “Are they all for you then?”

“Not at all. Come here.” Jace grabbed the fork lying next to the plate and tore off a bit of pancake, holding it out towards Simon. Simon stepped closer and, instead of taking the fork, leaned forward to pull the pancake of it. He gave an appreciative moan as he chewed.

“Morning.” Izzy’s greeting was drawn out and Jace looked at her wide-eyed. He hadn’t heard her come in. She raised an eyebrow at him. “Don’t let me interrupt, I was just grabbing a drink.” Quickly grabbing a glass of water, Izzy turned and head back out of the room, throwing a last knowing look at Jace over her shoulder.

The other guests who were staying at the house started to materialise not long after Izzy and Jace ended up making pancakes for everyone. The sweet smell filling the kitchen was becoming increasingly overpowering so Jace was relieved when Maryse came in and ushered everyone into the entrance hall.

“There are some finishing touches that need to be sorted before this afternoon so I need all hands on deck to make sure everything is ready in time.” She glanced down at the piece of paper in her hand. “Does anyone know how to do some nice napkin folding? The dining tables need a little something more.”

“Uh, I do,” Maia stepped forward, hand half raised. “I had to learn for a job I was doing. I could use some help doing it all though.”

“Of course. Take Isabelle, Jace and Simon with you.”

The four of them headed off to the marquee where the reception was being held as Maryse continued going through her list of tasks.

“Wow, you guys did a great job in here,” Izzy said to Jace and Simon, examining the decorations they’d put up the day before. “It looks amazing.” Simon beamed, grateful for the praise, and Jace found himself smiling too.

Maia showed them a sophisticated yet simple technique to fold the napkins and made them practice it until she satisfied it was up to scratch. She gave Izzy, Jace and Simon a nod of approval and the group dispersed to get on with the napkin folding.

When they were almost done Jace found himself working at the table next to Simon and stopped to watch him, a soft smile playing on his lips when he heard that Simon was humming to himself as he worked. Jace had been really focusing to make sure his napkin folding looked neat but Simon made it look effortless, fingers folding the napkins expertly. He was so enthralled by watching Simon that Jace didn’t realise Izzy had appeared next to him until he heard her voice in his ear.

“He’s, uh, got very skilled hands, wouldn’t you say?”

“Iz!” Jace exclaimed feeling the heat rise on his cheeks.

“What?! He’s doing a good job with the napkin folding, that’s all I meant.”

“Sure, Izzy. Sure.” Jace rolled his eyes at her as he folded the last napkin on his table. The group then headed back to the house to check in with Maryse and see if there was anything else that needed doing.

“No, it’s all done. Thank you. Now go and get ready,” she said, shooing them upstairs.

Jace was ready before Simon. Checking his tie in the mirror one last time he decided to head downstairs.

“I’ll meet you in the entrance hall with everyone else,” he called to Simon through the bathroom door before leaving the room.

Ten minutes later, Simon appeared downstairs. Jace was talking to Raj when Raj’s eyes shifted, looking over Jace’s shoulder. Seconds later Jace felt someone tap him on the back.

“He-” Jace’s greeting stuck in his throat as he turned around and saw Simon standing in front him. Simon had left in the curls that Jace had been so enamoured by that morning and he swallowed as he let his eyes roam over the suit Simon was wearing. It was a deep blue that Simon had paired with a white shirt and it fit him perfectly. A glisten of metal caught Jace’s eye and he noticed that Simon was wearing his father’s Star of David cufflinks. Elaine had given them to Simon for his 18th birthday and Simon had worn them proudly to every formal event since, a representation of his faith which was so important to him and a way to feel closer to his father. Jace smiled and moved his gaze back up to meet Simon’s eyes.

“Wow, Simon. You look amazing.” Simon smiled softly, taking a step closer to Jace and placing his hand on Jace’s upper arm.

“Thanks babe. So do you.” If Jace didn’t know any better he could have sworn than Simon’s eyes had raked over his body, checking him out. When he refocused, Simon was staring at him intensely, biting his lip. Jace stared back, a thousand thoughts running through his head.

The moment was broken by Maryse appearing and telling the assembled group to head outside and take their seats. As Jace made to move, Simon ran his hand down Jace’s arm to take his hand and the pair headed outside.

Jace sat on the second row with Simon on one side and Isabelle and Maia on the other. In front of them were his parents, with Max sat between them, and Luke on Maryse’s other side. As much as Maryse and Robert were trying to put up a friendly facade, they’d barely said two words to each other since Robert had arrived. Although, Jace mused, it was probably better that way. He didn’t want his brother’s day to be ruined by their parents getting in to what would undoubtedly be a loud and drawn out argument.

Once everyone was seated the officiant welcomed the guests and the ceremony began. In front of him Maryse had begun to cry almost a soon as she saw Alec, a watery smile on her face, and Jace could tell how proud she was. He saw Max place his hand on top of hers for a moment as Luke passed her a tissue.

As Magnus read his vows Jace felt himself tearing up. The words were so full of love and joy and Jace smiled widely, so happy that the pair had found each other. When Alec began his own vows, Jace let the tears roll down his cheek. Jace knew that Alec had spent hours trying to find the right words to talk about how much Magnus meant to him, writing and rewriting the vows until they were perfect and he’d succeeded, his words were beautiful.

It was at that moment that Simon reached out and took Jace’s hand, threading their fingers together. Jace’s heart was pounding. Simon had reached out for his hand during the most romantic part of the ceremony. What did it mean? Jace looked over at him and saw the tears running down Simon’s cheek. Jace gently squeezed his hand and Simon turned to look at Jace, smiling at him warmly and maybe it was the romantic atmosphere but Jace felt his heart fill with affection for Simon as he smiled softly back.

***

Once the ceremony was over everyone headed to the marquee for the meal. Jace and Simon ended up at a table with some of Maryse’s distant relatives. Jace had no idea who exactly they were but he did know that they were incredibly interested in his love life.

“So, when are you two getting married?” one of them asked, gesturing at Jace and Simon. Jace laughed nervously, eyes wide as he glanced over at Simon. Under the table Simon grabbed Jace’s hand, rubbing slow soothing circle on the back of it with his thumb. Jace felt himself start to relax, grateful that Simon was there as it was a trick only he knew to calm Jace down. Jace took a couple of deep breaths, preparing himself to answer his relatives questions when Simon jumped in before he had a chance.

“It’s early days yet,” he explained, still rubbing Jace’s hand soothingly. Jace wondered if perhaps it was as calming a gesture for Simon as it was for him. Simon continued, “We haven’t discussed it yet.” The relative who had asked made a noise that suggested she thought they should get on with it but said no more, turning back to her meal. The rest of the relatives continued to question Jace and Simon on every aspect of their lives. The pair were incredibly relieved when dinner was over and they could get away from the interrogation.

The tables and chairs were pushed to the sides of the marquee to make room for dancing and music began to play. Luke was leading Maryse all over the dancefloor and Jace was pleased to see how carefree she looked now all the wedding planning was over. Izzy and Maia were lost in their own little world in the corner, swaying gently in time to the music but unable to take their eyes off each other.

He turned to say something to Simon but he was gone, having moved to the other side of the room to talk to Clary. Jace sighed and went to congratulate Alec and Magnus. The happy couple were excitedly discussing their honeymoon plans when Simon tapped Jace on the shoulder.

“I believe you owe me a dance,” he said with a grin, holding out his hand to Jace. Jace excused himself and let Simon drag him onto the dancefloor.

The song playing was slow and Jace reached out to place a hand on Simon’s waist, pulling him closer. They swayed together gently for a while, Simon not taking his eyes off of Jace as they moved. Remembering their conversation from a few weeks ago, Jace waited for a perfect moment in the music to dip Simon. Simon let out a shocked laugh, tightening his grip on Jace until he was standing upright again.

“See, I didn’t drop you,” Jace said with a grin.

“What an achievement!” Simon exclaimed with a laugh.

They continued their swaying as the song changed until Jace recognised what was playing and faltered. _I’m Yours_. Memories of the night before came rushing back to Jace, remembering Simon’s voice singing it flawlessly, remembering how Simon’s eyes met his as he sang the chorus, wondering what it meant. Jace regained his footing quickly but Simon had noticed and gave Jace a questioning look.

“The song,” Jace whispered, watching Simon for his reaction. Simon smiled softly.

“Yeah.” Simon’s response was breathless, barely above a whisper as he moved ever so slightly closer to Jace. Simon’s eyes flickered down to Jace’s lips almost indiscernibly and Jace closed the gap between them further still. Simon’s eyes were locked on his but Jace noticed Simon’s tongue dart out to lick his lips and he wanted so badly to kiss him. But he couldn’t. Not like this. Not if it was just part of their fake relationship. Not if it didn’t mean anything.

Jace took a step backwards, widening the gap between them once more, but he didn’t let go of Simon worried that he might fall if he did.

“Jace, are you ok?” Simon voice was full of concern.

“I’m- shit. I don’t know I just- I can’t do this. I need to- I need to leave.”

“Ok. That’s ok, Jace. _You’re_ ok. You can leave if you want to. Do you want me to help you leave without everyone noticing?”

“Please.” Jace was so grateful that Simon knew exactly how to help him without Jace having to say anything.

“Ok. How about we move slowly towards the edge of the room and then you slip away? Does that sound ok?”

“Yes.” Simon kept a steady grip on Jace as he manoeuvred them to the side of the room, trying to make it look as natural as possible. Jace slipped away after assuring Simon that he’d be alright to head back to their room alone and hurried out of the marquee.

***

Jace changed out of his suit as soon as he got to the room and sat on the edge of the bed. He buried his head in his hands. All the feelings and emotions he’d been trying to ignore hit him and the tears started to pour.

Fifteen minutes later there was a knock on the door.

“Jace, it’s Simon. Can I come in?” Jace wiped his eyes and called out that he could. Simon stepped into the room, shutting the door gently behind him.

“I stayed long enough to say goodnight to people. I told your family you were exhausted so went to bed. They understood.” Simon gestured to the empty spot next to Jace. “Can I sit?” Jace nodded.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Simon asked.

“I- I was going to kiss you. I- I shouldn’t ha- I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologise, Jace. You didn’t do anything wrong. We agreed that kissing was ok when we discussed boundaries. I wan- I would have been ok with it.” Simon’s words felt like a stab in the heart. Jace thought that maybe Simon had wanted to kiss him too, had thought that something had changed between them over the past couple of days but he’d obviously just misread the signs. Of course Simon didn’t return his feelings, it was all just part of their agreement. Simon just thought he was helping Jace.

“Still…” Jace trailed off, unsure what to say. Simon moved his hand as if to place it on Jace’s but Jace pulled his hand away. Simon retracted his own immediately.

“Sorry. Jace, is there something more going on? You know I’m here for you, you can tell-”

“I’m fine, Simon,” Jace interrupted. “Don’t worry. You can stay here. I’m just gonna- gonna go somewhere else for a bit.”

Not waiting for a response Jace stood and headed out of the room. He walked around the house for a bit, trying to clear his head, and eventually ended up in a small empty bedroom at the back of the house. Knowing that no one was likely to find him there Jace laid down on the bed, thoughts swimming through his head until he fell into a restless sleep.

Waking early the next morning, Jace headed back to his room to get dressed before facing the day ahead. Simon was still sleeping peacefully so Jace headed into the bathroom to take a long, hot shower in the hope that it would relieve some of his tension.

***

The day was spent helping tidy up the place. For the most part Jace avoided Simon. Not that it stopped Jace from watching him from afar, torn between wanting to speak to him and wanting to run a million miles away to wallow in his feelings in peace.

Simon, seeming to sense that Jace didn’t want to talk to him, kept his distance from Jace instead chatting with Clary, although Jace did catch him looking his way a few times. Jace sighed, heading towards the door to go and help out somewhere else, somewhere he wouldn’t be distracted by Simon. Izzy looked at him as he passed her, eyebrows raised, but Jace just shrugged and walked out.

He found Maryse and Luke taking bag after bag of rubbish out of the house so he gave them a hand, claiming he just wanted to help them get the job done quicker. When they were done, Maryse said she was going to get the dinner ready and Jace instantly offered to help her. He’d always enjoyed helping her in the kitchen. When he’d first moved in with the Lightwoods he was the only one who’d actually liked the job and it had helped him bond with Maryse. Standing side by side with her now, chopping vegetables, Jace felt like he was 10 years old again.

There was just time for them to eat the dinner before the taxi arrived to take Simon to the airport. The rest of the group were staying on a bit longer but it was nearly Rebecca’s birthday and Simon wanted to be back in time to celebrate with her.

Jace and Simon made a song and dance of saying goodbye to each other with plenty of hugs and hand holding and softly spoken words but Jace’s heart wasn’t in it. He was tense, his smile forced and Jace knew that Simon had noticed from the confused look he shot Jace. Jace shook his head almost imperceptibly and walked Simon over to the waiting car.

“Thank you,” he whispered to Simon before closing the door and watching the vehicle drive away.

Jace figured he must have looked sad as he returned to the group because Maryse pulled him into a hug, whispering “it’s ok love, you’ll see him again soon” as she stroked his hair like she’d done when he was younger. Jace didn’t tell her that wasn’t the issue instead slumping into her embrace, grateful for his mother’s comfort.

As the group headed back inside, Izzy pulled Jace aside and asked him what was going on.

“You know you can talk to me Jace.”

“Not here,” Jace said looking at the rest of his family gathered nearby. Izzy nodded and pulled Jace with her to the other side of the house.

“What’s going on Jace? Did something happen with Simon? Because you looked miserable when he left and you’ve been distant all day.”

“You know when you suggested I ask Simon to pretend to be my date and I said it would be awkward because he’s my best friend?” Izzy nodded. “Well, that wasn’t entirely true. I didn’t want to ask him because I thought I might have feelings for him… and I didn’t want him to pretend to be my boyfriend because I knew I’d have to deal with those feelings and confront the fact that I like him, Iz. Like-like him. Spending all this time with him, pretending we were couple, has only made those feelings stronger and for what? It’s not like he likes me back. I should have just told Alec I’d lied from the beginning.”

“Well, that I agree with. And I’m sorry you’re feeling like this Jace, I really am, but I don’t think you’re right. About Simon not liking you back, I mean. I’ve seen the way he looks at you Jace. And before you say anything -” Izzy held up a finger to silence Jace “- I don’t just mean while he’s been pretending to date you. He looks at you like you hung the moon and stars, Jace, and he kept watching you, sneaking furtive glances at you when he thought no one was looking. It’s the same way you look at him. Maybe you should try talking to him?”

“I don’t know, Iz. I just-” Jace sighed. “I don’t want to ruin anything.”

“Sometimes you’ve just got to take a chance, Jace. You might be surprised by the outcome. What you decide to do is up to you but I’m here for you whatever, ok?” Jace nodded.

“Thanks, Izzy.”

***

Jace spent the rest of the time until they flew back to New York moping around and arguing with himself about whether or not to contact Simon.

On the one hand, the sooner he spoke to Simon the sooner he’d know how Simon felt. At least then if Simon didn’t reciprocate his feelings, which Jace was convinced was the case, he could try to move on.

On the other hand, he didn’t want to have that conversation. He’d never been good at talking to people about his feelings and the thought of telling Simon how he felt terrified him. Plus, Simon was at home with his family and Jace didn’t want to disrupt their time together. That’s the excuse he told himself over and over in his head for not calling him. Anyway, it wasn’t exactly the type of conversation someone should have over the phone.

Back in New York however, Jace continued to avoid Simon. Simon had tried to call him a couple of times but Jace had just let it ring and eventually the calls had stopped.

The universe obviously had other plans for him though as Simon seemed to be everywhere he went. A week or so after the wedding he’d turned up at Maia’s one afternoon but when she answered the door he could see Simon and Izzy chatting in the living room. Giving an excuse Jace all but fled, not ready to face Simon, especially with other people around.

A week later Jace was sitting in a coffee shop when Simon walked in. He shouldn’t have been surprised, not really. It was the coffee shop he and Simon always went to together so it made sense that Simon would go there. Luckily Jace had seated himself in a secluded corner and was able to make a speedy escape without being spotted. He knew he’d have to face Simon eventually though and he was beginning to think he was running out of time to hide.

That afternoon Jace went round to visit Alec and Magnus who had returned from their honeymoon a couple of days earlier. He was looking forward to catching up with them and they always came back the most amazing stories to tell whenever they went travelling.

“So, tell me all about it!” Jace said once they’d been through the standard greetings and were sitting in the living room, drinks in hand. Alec and Magnus shared a look.

“Ok, maybe not all about it,” Jace chuckled, “there are some things I do not need to know.”

The couple launched into a retelling of the events of their honeymoon, complete with emphatic arm movements and plenty of “oh and remember when? - yes!” moments. Jace couldn’t help but smile watching them together and he had almost forgotten what was going on in his own life when the conversation turned to him.

“So, how’s Simon? I’m surprised he didn’t come with you,” Alec said.

“Oh, yeah. Well, he uh- he had other things to do but- but he’s fine I guess.” Jace’s response was dismissive and he saw Alec and Magnus frown.

“Has something happened? You seemed so happy at the wedding,” Magnus said.

“Yeah.” Jace drew the word out, studying his feet intensely to avoid meeting their eyes. He could feel his emotions threatening to take over and tried desperately to push them back down. “Sometimes things aren’t what they seem.”

“Oh no, are you still- did you break up?” Jace stayed silent which they took as confirmation. Alec and Magnus started to trying to comfort him but their care only made Jace’s emotions bubble up again until he couldn’t take their pitying looks or words of comfort anymore.

So he told them everything. He told them how he’d panicked when Alec asked him if he had a date and said yes. He told them how he’d tried to find someone to pretend to be his date and had eventually asked Simon. He told them how they’d discussed and detailed everything that being fake boyfriends would entail. He told them how everything they’d seen between the two of them hadn’t been real and finally he told them how sorry he was for lying to them.

Alec and Magnus sat silently for a moment, identical looks of shock on their faces.

“But- but it seemed so real. The way you acted around each other, the things you said, the way you looked at each other,” Alec said.

“Well, that last part was real, on my end at least.” When Alec gave him a questioning look Jace continued, “I like Simon. I did before this whole thing started and it’s only escalated from there.”

“For what it’s worth Jace, I don’t think the fond looks were only real on your end,” Magnus added.

Jace left Alec and Magnus’ home that day feeling more confused than ever.

***

Jace was woken up the next morning by a loud banging on his door. Letting out a groan of frustration he got up and padded over to the door. He opened it to find Clary standing there, fist raised ready to knock again.

“What are-”

“Your mom let me in. We need to talk.” Clary pushed the door open further and barged into his room. Jace was about to protest when he saw the furious look on her face. He immediately sat down on his bed, looking remorseful.

“What’s going on with you? Simon hasn’t heard from you for, what, two or three weeks now? I haven’t seen him this upset for ages. You’ve been ignoring his calls and the only reason he knows you’re alright is because he’s spoken to your sister. After all he did pretending to be your boyfriend you just stop talking to him and avoid him completely? You’re meant to be his friend, Jace, so what’s going on?”

The reality of Jace’s behaviour over the last two weeks came crashing down on him. He’s been so caught up with avoiding his own feelings that he’d hurt Simon which was the last thing he ever wanted to do. He’d been worried that telling Simon how he felt would ruin their friendship but he’d probably done far more damage by not talking to him at all.

“I’m sorry. You’re right, I’ve been a terrible friend. I’ll fix it. I promise.” Clary, expecting Jace to fight back, had been about to argue with him. Realising what Jace had actually said she softened slightly.

“Oh. Well good. If you don’t I _will_ hear about it and I _will_ come back.”

“I’d expect nothing less,” Jace responded.

After Clary left Jace quickly got ready and headed to Simon’s. He stopped at their coffee shop on the way to pick up Simon’s usual coffee with milk and sugar. Jace saw Simon’s smile drop when he answered the door and saw who was there.

“What do you want, Jace?” He sounded tired.

“Can we talk?” Jace held the coffee cup out in front of him as a peace offering. Simon accepted it, the corners of his mouth turning up ever so slightly, as he moved aside to let Jace in. Simon sat on the opposite end of the sofa to Jace, nursing his coffee cup in his hands. He gestured towards Jace.

“So talk.”

“Simon, I am _so_ sorry for the way I’ve acted towards you recently - ignoring your calls, avoiding you. I’ve not been a good friend to you and I’m truly sorry.”

“You know, I understood your distance at first. After our conversation at the wedding I knew something was up but I didn’t want to push you. I figured you’d talk to me about what was going on when you were ready. I thought you just needed a bit of time to figure it out and I wanted to give you space to do so. So when you started distancing yourself from me before I left I didn’t say anything. Then you were back in New York and you still kept ignoring my messages and my calls and I thought maybe you still needed time. But days turned into weeks and I still hadn’t heard from you. I was worried about you.” Simon’s voice cracked and Jace glanced up to meet Simon’s eyes. They were swimming with concern and hurt and Jace looked away again, fixing his gaze on the plant on the windowsill.

“You don’t need to be. You’re right, I did need time but then it just turned to wallowing in self pity and I pushed you away instead of just telling you how I feel about you like I should have do-” Jace cut himself off, realising what he’d said and turned back to Simon, eyes wide. Simon was staring back at him.

“Wait? How you feel about me? Jace, what-” Jace took a deep breath.

“I like you, Simon. Like-like you. I have for a while -” Jace rubbed the back of his neck “- but I didn’t want to say anything. Didn’t want to ruin our friendship. But the week of the wedding, spending all that time pretending we were a couple, I just- it was overwhelming. That’s why I became withdrawn. That’s why I pushed you away. It’s not an excuse, I know that, but that’s what’s been going on.” When Simon didn’t respond Jace felt his heart sink. He started to get up when Simon spoke.

“Jace, wait. Why didn’t you say something?”

“Because I didn’t think anything would ever come of it and you spent a lot of time whispering with Clary I just figur-”

“What, that there was something between us?” Simon interrupted with a disbelieving laugh. “Because I can assure you there isn’t. I was talking to her so much because she knew that we were only pretending to date and I needed someone to talk to about my own feelings,” Simon said, glancing away from Jace. “My own feelings for _you_.” Simon looked back at Jace, biting at his lip nervously.

“I- wait- you-”

“I like you too, Jace. Like-like you. Come on, I sang _I’m Yours_ to you!”

“But- but I thought- I mean I hoped it wasn’t but I thought that was just for show?”

“Not at all,” Simon responded. Jace felt all of the tension that had built up inside him over the past few weeks dissipate and he started to laugh. It didn’t take long for Simon to start laughing too.

“You mean to say,” Jace said when he finally stopped laughing, “that we could have sorted this all out weeks ago if we’d just _talked_.”

“Yeah, I guess so. But the important thing is that we got there eventually,” Simon responded, smiling brightly.

“Yeah, yeah we did.” Jace’s wide grin mirroring Simon’s. “You know when we almost kissed at the party?” Simon nodded. “I’d got swept up in the moment and I stopped myself because I didn’t want to kiss you if it didn’t mean anything, if it was just part of us pretending to be together.”

“I didn’t want that either,” said Simon, shuffling closer to Jace on the sofa. “But you know, we could fix that now.” Simon’s eyes flickered down to Jace’s lips then back up to meet his eyes. “Can I kiss you?”

“Yes.”

Simon reached out a hand to cup Jace’s face as he leaned forward to kiss him. The kiss was gentle and slow and full of all of the emotions they’d both been pushing down for so long. After what felt like simultaneously seconds and hours Simon pulled away, resting his forehead against Jace’s with a soft smile. He rubbed his thumb along Jace’s cheek as Jace took Simon’s free hand in his own.

They sat together for hours, talking mostly but every so often one of them would move forward to kiss the other, smiles never leaving their faces.

***

Jace and Simon didn’t tell anyone that they were dating for real. It was new and they wanted to wait for the right moment. Instead they just told everyone that they’d talked and cleared the air, which was technically true, so their friends would stop worrying about them.

It had been a couple of weeks and Jace was paying Maia a visit. Izzy answered the door, having all but moved in with Maia, and invited Jace in.

“Simon’s here, by the way,” she whispered to him. “I know you two talked out your differences but if it’s still weird between you I’m sure we can come up with something.”

“No, it’s fine Iz. We’re good,” Jace said, having known full well that Simon would be there as well.

Jace immediately went and sat next to Simon who smiled at him softly before resting his head on Jace’s shoulder. Jace saw Izzy and Maia share a look but they didn’t say anything. Jace took Simon’s hand and threaded their fingers together. As the group talked Jace and Simon kept referring to each other by as many different pet names as they could think of from ‘babe’ to ‘pumpkin’ to ‘cupcake’. Each time Izzy and Maia shared another look.

“Ok. What is going on with you two?” Maia said and Jace and Simon shared a grin. “We know you were faking at the wedding, you don’t have to keep it up now. Unless...” she trailed off, looking from Jace to Simon and back again.

“Unless we’re not faking anymore,” Jace said, finishing Maia’s sentence for her.

“You mean you’re-” Izzy started, gesturing between the two.

“Dating? Yeah, we are,” Simon said, turning to Jace and smiling softly.

“I’m so happy for you!” Izzy exclaimed, getting up to throw her arms around the pair. Jace and Simon laughed, hugging her back.

***

**_One month later_ **

That day they’d arranged to meet at a coffee shop near Simon’s flat. Simon had been away with his mother and sister visiting family in Florida and had got back the day before. Jace had been looking forward to seeing Simon all week; they’d spoken every day while he was gone but nothing beat spending time with his boyfriend in person.

As soon as Simon stepped inside the coffee shop Jace called his name and waved at him. Simon grinned and headed over to the table Jace was sat at, complete with two coffees and a large slice of cake.

“I figured I’d get your usual order for you while I waited,” Jace said by way of greeting. “I already ate my cake though!”

“Thanks.” Simon pressed a kiss to Jace’s forehead before sitting down opposite him and launching into a recap of everything that had happened while he was away. Jace was only half paying attention, instead watching the way Simon’s face lit up as he spoke, the way his eyes crinkled in the corners as he laughed his way through a story of something he and Rebecca had done. Jace was pulled from his thoughts when he realised Simon had been saying his name.

“Huh?”

“I asked what your thoughts were?”

“Thoughts on what?” Jace asked.

“On coming to dinner with my family. My mom and sister already love you but I wanted to formally introduce you to them as my boyfriend. Is that weird?”

“No, not at all,” Jace said, shaking his head. “That sounds great.”

“Good.” Simon grinned. He stopped to take a bite of his cake before continuing, “Anyway, I saw a poster this morning for this Star Wars convention and I was thinking we could go and maybe dress up as-”

“I love you,” Jace said. His heart was pounding. He’d known for a while but he’d been waiting for the right moment to tell Simon. Watching him talk animatedly about them going in cosplay to a Star Wars convention seemed as good a time as any.

“I love you too.” The warmth in Simon’s eyes made Jace feel _safe_ and _home_ , the smile on his lips like a promise of things to come.

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to come and yell with me about Jimon on tumblr at [sunshinerosende](http://sunshinerosende.tumblr.com).


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